Marry me Angel
by Dean's Little Secret
Summary: Third in the Angel series . Sequel to Agngel Eyes. Jak askes Keira to marry him, but will she say yes?


**Warning: Mention of rape**

**Marry me Angel?**

"I want to learn to fight."

Jak looked up from his morning coffee and stared at Keira, who sat next to him at the bar "Excuse me?"

"I want to learn to fight" she said again, a small frown on her angelic face "Is that ok with you?"

"No, it's not ok with me" he replied, "it's dangerous Keira, I'd rather see you fixing a car than fighting a Metal Head or some crazed killer."

"You get to fight Metal Heads and crazed killers, so why can't I?" she demanded, bitterness leaking into her tone.

"Because I can heal myself and-"

"-If you say its because you're a guy I swear to God Jak you will be limping out of this bar."

"Wasn't going to say that" he snapped, she flinched under the harshness of his tone and he stood up and pulled her into his loving embrace "You don't need to fight Keira, you have me, I'm always gonna be there to protect you."

She pulled back, looking up at her lover "But you're not, Jak! That's just it! You can't always be there for me, you have other responsibilities and I can't ask you to watch me 24/7 when I know you have other more important things to do."

"Ok, first, nothing in this _world_ is more important than you and ok, maybe I can't always be there to protect you but if the time comes I will be" he kissed her tenderly "I love you, and you don't need to learn to fight."

"Jak I want to" she looked up at him with pleading eyes "can't you teach me, please?"

Jak bit his lip, he could never say no to her when she looked at him like this "Fine, but under my rules."

She smiled, the smile that made Jak's heart flutter and his knees go weak no matter how many times he saw it "Thank you" she threw her slim arms around his neck and held him close, taking in his scent and warmth "You're the best."

He pressed his lips to her ear, smiling "Damn right I am."

"Ok now you're gloating," she giggled "But I don't mind" a sly smile played at her features "I'm sure you are the best" she ran her fingers up his toned chest, playing with the collar of his shirt "You know, Dax and Tess aren't here and you do have a room upstairs, we could" she stepped closer, her other hand tracing the inside of his thigh.

Jak moved back and took Keira's hand into his own, the one that had been playing with his shirt "Behave my angel" he kissed her hand "so why are you so interested to fight all of a sudden?"

Keira forced away the hurt, she just wished Jak would let his guard down and allow them to at least try and make love "Well…" it was her turn to bit her lip "I didn't tell you" Jak's body tensed and his brow furrowed "but it's not a big deal" she emphasised her words "but someone broke into my apartment the other night" she looked away, like she was ashamed.

"WHAT?" he bellowed "who? Did they hurt you?" he gripped her shoulder's "how could you not tell me?"

"Jak!" she hissed, "I am fine! God I'm not a little girl who can be pushed around" she pulled out of his fierce grip "and this is _exactly_ why I didn't tell you, I knew you'd overreact."

"Someone broke into your apartment and you expect me to be calm?" he demanded, eyes darkening with rage, he had to compose himself or he might lose control "did they take anything?"

"Just some money" she shrugged "no big deal, I walked in on them and they ran off."

"You walked in?" he asked, voice cracking "you could have been hurt or worse" a shiver ran through him at the mere thought.

"But I wasn't" she shot back "they ran out the door like the scaredy cats they are."

Jak narrowed his eyes "are you telling me the truth?"

"What!?" she exclaimed "ok they pushed me to the ground and…" she trailed off.

"And what?"

"Ashelin showed up before it got worse."

"I'm gonna kill them" Jak growled, his voice changing to an icy tone "I will tear this city apart until I find them!"

"Jak, no you won't" Keira placed both her hands onto his face, her soft touching sending some of the rage away "You will wait for the KG to find them and you will do as I ask and teach me to fight."

Jak placed his hands over hers, "You could have been hurt."

"I wasn't, just shaken up."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I knew you'd want their hands on a silver platter."

"I want more then that," he growled angrily.

"Damn it Jak" Keira pulled away, stepping back as she wrapped her arms around herself "I hate it when you talk like that, you said like a…"

"A what" he shouted, "c'mon say it Keira!"

"A monster!"

"Got news for your love, I am a monster."

"No you are not" she stepped back, still keeping her distance "Dark is the monster, but he is not you but sometimes the lines blur and I don't know who's who."

"You're still callin' me a monster" he said brusquely "but it's who I am and I honestly thought you got over your problem and loved me for all of me, but I was mistaken" he spun on his heel and stormed towards the door, his heart thudding in his ears and tears blinding him.

"Oh great" she said sarcastically "just storm off, that'll fix everything."

He spun back around, so fast that he gave himself a head spin "what do you want me to do, huh,"

"Talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about! You started this fight!"

"Oh I did not" her angel eyes narrowed and her brow knitted into a scowl "I just said that-"

"-That I was a monster" he interrupted "yeah, see you started this."

"Oh grow up!"

"I did grow up Keira, when I was in the Baron's prison and while you were busy screwing Erol."

"I never slept with Erol" she shot back promptly "But, hey, since we're on the subject, how was prison Jak? Don't spare the details."

Jak looked away, rage, hurt and humiliation clouding his eyes "why do you keep asking me this?"

"Because I want to understand what happened to you Jak" she walked towards him, pushing down her fear "I need to know Jak, and you need to let me in, if you just tell me I can help you."

"I don't need help!" he snapped.

"Yes you do" she stepped closer, she could see Jak's eyes, they were almost black, if she pushed him too far he'd change into Dark and all hell would break loose "I know you still have nightmares about prison and I can still see the pain in your eyes" she paused, Jak didn't say anything so she continued "It's going to kill you Jak!"

"You don't need to know" he spun to face her, sparks of dark eco crackled on his skin "just… God, what are we even fighting about?" with every ounce of strength Jak forced away the rage and locked Dark deep within his mind.

"I don't know" Keira's shoulder sagged and she looked down at the ground "I'm sorry."

Jak walked towards her, all his anger disappearing at the sight of her looking so hurt "No, I'm sorry" he pulled her into his arms "we've really gotta stop doing this."

Keira looked up and laughed half-heartedly "I agree…" she bit her lip, forced away the tears and the lump in her throat "You're not a monster Jak, I didn't mean it."

Jak sighed, "It's ok."

"I guess I should go," she said taking a step back "what do you have planned for today?"

"Hmm, not sure" he said shrugging. "How about I teach you some tricks?"

Keira perked up "I'd like that."

"Ok, great, and I think I should stay at your place until we find the guys who broke in, I mean, if it's ok with you, of course."

"Sounds perfect Jak" she stepped onto her tippee-toes and kissed him tenderly "I'm truly sorry."

"Please, it's ok, lets just forget about it, ok?"

Keira gnawed at the inside of lip, she hated how Jak always chose to ignore things "ok" she kissed him once more "so, baby, what you gonna teach me?" she wiggled her eyebrows.

"First off" Jak swept Keira up into his arms in one swift motion "I'm going to teach that you're looks won't get you out of every mess" he nuzzled her neck, making her giggle "might work with me though."

**X-X-X-X-X-X**

Learning to fight was never easy, learning to fight with your over protective, eco infused boyfriend was just impossible. Ok, he loved her, lots, but he was supposed to be teaching her to fight, which meant actual fighting. At first he showed her how to defend herself against a boxing bag, which did nothing but swing back and hit her, knocking her backwards, only to be caught in Jak's waiting arms. It was cute and all but Keira wanted to learn to fight, not fall on her ass. So they moved on to hand to hand combat, but he wouldn't hit her, he just threw punches that ended long before they connected with her small delicate body. But how was she going to learn to fight if she couldn't deal with pain. A good fighter could handle pain and bounce back from it.

"Damn it Jak" she shouted "this is getting me nowhere!"

"You're doing all right."

"You won't even hit me."

He blinked; looking innocent and adorable but now was no time to lose herself in Jak's handsome features.

"Throw a punch and hit me! I can take it."

"Have you ever been punched?" he asked, crossing his arms.

"No, I broke my leg though."

Jak cringed at the memory of having to see his little angel in so much pain "Yeah but-"

"-Hit me!" she said throwing her arms up in frustration.

"No."

"Jak" Keira's brow furrowed in irritation "what if I hit you first?"

"I'll dodge it" he pulled one of his famous cocky grins and Keira vowed to wipe that look of his face, which she did. One swift kick to the abdomen had Jak doubled over in pain and the cocky grin was nowhere to be seen "That… was… a kick" he panted "not a hit" he righted himself, his light eco infused body recovering quicker then any normal elf's would. "But that was a good."

She mirrored his cocky grin; only it came out rather seductive "will you hit me now?"

"No" he repeated, "I would never hurt you."

"I know that Jak" she said, irritation now higher then before "but I can take it!"

Jak shook his head "if I seriously hurt you, you can't tell your father."

"Of course not" she laughed, excitement replacing her annoyance "Ok, go for it."

Jak took a deep breath then sent a first towards her leg, she moved out of the way just in time, jumping onto his back as he stumbled forwards. She covered his eyes with her hands, both young elves laughing. It seemed a lifetime since they had just simply had fun, a lifetime since they just laughed and played around like fools. The harsh world around them had forced them to abandon their last attachments to childhood and grow up and learn to fight for their lives in a different ways each day.

"Ok, that's cheating" Jak said pulling Keira's hands away from his eyes "but you're quick and light, gives you the upper hand."

"On you" she said letting go of him and coming to stand before him "what about a metal head or something else big and nasty."

He smiled at her, brushing strands of turquoise hair from her face "who would hurt you" he kissed her tenderly "you're so beautiful."

She returned the smile "Teach me to use a gun."

His shoulder sagged "anything else?"

"Well" a sly grin that meant she was talking about 'that' played on her features "you could teach me how to-" her words were silenced with a searing kiss, that made the she-elf melt and lose all thoughts.

The kiss ended and both elves took in a deep breath "c'mon, let me show you how to use a gun."

Keira nodded, disappointed that the kiss had ended rather than escalated. "Baby, why do you pull away?"

Jak looked down and turned his head "it's not something I want to talk about right now. Can we just head to the gun course?" he looked up now, pain and uncertainty in his ocean blue eyes.

"Of course my love" Keira kissed the tip of his nose.

**X-X-X-X-X-X**

Two weeks later and Keira had learnt how to use a gun, block attacks and even managed to knock Jak down a few times, though he was probably faking it. Still, she could fight now, she could shoot a gun and she had a high score at the gun course. The last two weeks had been full of training and plenty of sweet moments with Jak, but one thing still annoyed her. Jak wouldn't make love to her. Every time she tried to suggest they do 'that' he would pull away or change the subject and it was worrying. But now was no time to worry about her slightly evasive boyfriend. Keira was now facing an angry metal head, Jak was standing behind her.

Keira pointed the gun at the metal head and took aim then fired. It howled in pain before falling lifeless to the ground with a thud and a puff of dirt rose into the air. Keira jumped in joy before spinning around to face Jak, an unreadable expression on his handsome face. Her brows furrowed and she stuck her hip out in annoyance. Jak looked down at the young she elf and smiled softly before brushing a few strands of hair from her face.

"Stay still" he said in audible whisper.

"Why?" she asked, her heart quickening.

"We're being watched" he encircled her with his arms, protecting her from the lurking danger.

"By what?"

"A metal head" he pulled her closer, taking the gun from her "I can't see it, but I can hear it. Just stay near me."

Keira pressed herself against Jak, feeling his steady heartbeat beneath her ear. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, she felt Jak tense then something pulled her legs out from under her. She thought she was about to be pulled away from Jak but he held her hands, something was around her waist and legs and pulling her away from her man.

"Jak!" she shrieked.

"I got you" he said, "Just trust me."

Keira looked at Jak who seemed to be in pain, a minute later she found out why. His skin began to change to a sickly greyish purple and his beautiful eyes turned pitch black. Keira cringed at the creature but she was safe, Jak was in control.

"Hang on" he said, voice scratchy and nothing like what he normally sounded like. He let go of one of her hands before summoning a dark eco bomb, it shot past Keira and to the metal head that screamed in pain as its body exploded. A strong force sent Keira and Jak hurtling backwards and to the ground while soaking them in green blood.

Keira opened her eyes, now facing her Jak, his face covered with blood. She laughed and so did he, the fear now gone and replaced with a silly bout of the giggles. Suddenly it all stopped and Jak gazed longingly into Keira's eyes, her angel eyes, a genuine smile graced his face as he took in her beauty, even covered with goo she was gorgeous.

"Marry me?" the words left his mouth before he could stop them.

"What?" she gasped "Jak…? You're asking me this while I'm covered in blood and sweat?"

"Does it matter?"

Keira bit her lip and looked away "Jak, I have loved you for as long as I can remember but…" she looked back, pained but what she had to say "I don't think I'm ready for this, we've only officially been a couple for a few months and… Jak…" she fought off the tears "I can't marry you, not yet. I'm sorry."

**X-X-X-X-X-X**

Jak stared at the ceiling, the sound of heavy music drifted up from downstairs in the bar. He closed his eyes and tried to block it out, it was around midnight and all he wanted to do was sleep and forget today. He felt so stupid; he should have just kept his mouth shut. He rolled onto his side and looked at the clock, one minute past twelve, it was a new day. He should apologise to Keira, say sorry for what he asked, but it wasn't that bad. He just asked her to marry him and yeah it wasn't bad but it was serious. He'd asked her to marry him, what the hell was he thinking? But despite it being rushed and sudden he still expected her to say yes, his heart shattered when she said no.

Didn't she love him? He demised that thought, of course she did, she just wasn't ready to be a wife and he wasn't sure he was ready to be husband. But it seemed so right, he loved her, she loved him, why not get married? Well marriage was a huge step and she wasn't ready for it and Jak wasn't sure he was either but still they could get engaged and get married when they were ready. But she said no, said she couldn't and it broke Jak's heart.

Why didn't she want to marry him? Didn't she want to be wed to the dark eco freak? Well, he could understand why, he didn't even want to be himself some days. But Keira accepted him, dark or no dark, she loved him and he knew that. He pushed all his thoughts away and focused on sleep, needing to just rest his worried mind.

**X-X-X-X-X-X**

Keira sipped her morning coffee as she headed downstairs to the garage; she hadn't slept well the previous night, to worried about Jak. She was so worried that turning down his proposal would break them up; Jak had a hard enough time as it was without him thinking Keira didn't love him. But she did, more then life itself, he was the most important thing to her; she loved him with all her heart. So why couldn't she just say yes? She had no idea how to be a wife, that's why.

She sighed heavily, leaning against her workbench and eyeing the cars that needed to be fixed. She took one last sip from her coffee then went to work on the beauties that stood before her. She was heading to the broken hover car when she heard footsteps, she didn't need to worry though, they belonged to Jak. She felt his arms wrap around his waist and his hot breath made her shiver as it hit her neck.

"Morning beautiful" he said kissing her neck tenderly.

Keira turned around and caught his lips in a passionate kiss. She felt him hold her tight, protecting her from the world. The kiss deepened, the fire burned between them and Keira started to pull Jak's jacket off. She had enough of this, she wanted to share this with him, she loved him and wanted him to be the only one she slept with.

He pulled away though, shrugging back into his jacket. Keira stared at him with hurt, he looked innocent, a light shed of pink on his cheeks and a soft smile but his eyes… she saw fear. She reached out to him but he caught her hand and held it in his own, smiling wider.

"Damnit Jak" Keira said and she didn't mean to make it sound so harsh "why won't you do this with me?"

"I don't want to hurt you," he lied promptly.

"That's not it Jak" Keira protested, "it's something else… baby" she composed herself "baby just talk to me… please."

Jak looked away, shame clouding his features "Keira I can't."

"Why the hell not?" she snapped. "I love you and you want me to marry you and yet you won't even tell me why you won't have sex with me! What are you hiding?"

Jak's eyes narrowed "what makes you think I'm hiding something?" his tone was like ice.

"Because that's what you do Jak, you hide things from me, from Daxter, from everyone and no one knows or understand why you flinch when you get touched or why you pull away when I get to close."

Jak turned away, hiding the tears that burned his eyes "You don't need to know."

"I don't need to know?" she said throwing her arms up in frustration "why not? Don't I have a right to know?"

He turned back around now, dark eco sparks cracking against his skin "you wouldn't understand!" he roared, "no one will."

"You just have to try" she was crying now "just tell me… God… I love you and I just want to help you."

Jak softened as her tears fell, his heart aching at her pain "I… I don't want you to know" he was trying so hard to keep the tears at bay "I don't want you to know" his words were muffled by a sob and Keira flung herself into his arms, pulling him close and letting him sob quietly on her shoulder.

"It's ok baby," she whispered while caressing his hair "I'm here, I'm here."

Jak cried, his body quivering with sobs, "I didn't want… it… he… wouldn't stop… I begged."

Keira pulled back, Jak's incoherent words making her blood run cold "Baby" she held his face in her small hands "what happened?"

Jak wiped at his eyes angrily, his hands shook, his whole body shook and Keira just wanted to make him better but what could she do, she had to know what to fix first. "Erol…" he took a shuddered breath "He… he" Keira felt her breath hitch, oh God what did he do to her Jak? "He raped me." Jak fell back into Keira's arms. Her legs trembled and they both fell to the floor in a crying mess.

"I'm sorry" she whispered as she held him tight, never wanting to let go "I'm sorry" she rocked them both back and forwards gently, caressing Jak's hair. "I'm here baby, you're safe now."

After what felt like hours the tears subsided and Jak pulled back, wiping at his eyes angrily "I'm sorry" he looked away, ashamed.

"Don't be" Keira said kissing his forehead "I'm here for you Jak" he looked back at her, a faint smile on his face "I love you and I'm always here."

"Thank you" Jak sniffled, a feeble smile gracing his face. "I should have told you a long time ago… I've been carrying it around with me for so long… I just didn't want you to be disappointed in me."

"I could never be disappointed with you Jak" she kissed him softly "You're so strong and brave" she cupped his face with her hands, brushing away the fresh wave of tears "you didn't deserve what they did to you Jak… I wish… I wish I knew back then… I never would have said what I did… hell I would have beaten Erol bloody with a spanner."

Jak laughed, feeble but it was there "I would have stopped you" he said placing his hands over hers. "Only so you didn't end up in prison though, I think I'd actually enjoy the sight."

Keira laughed and true there was nothing funny about what happened but it was either laugh or cry and she had to stay strong for Jak "I love you" she gave him a quick kiss, but it still held all the love she had for Jak in it "and I will help you, anyway I can to move past this."

Jak smiled gratefully "Thank you Keira."

**X-X-X-X-X-X**

Letting the truth out had made Jak and Keira's relationship so much better, she understood why he panicked when he was touched in a certain way and why he held so much hatred. But things were better, Jak was making progress, he felt stupid at times, it had been three years since his days in jail but the memory still haunted him. He felt so pathetic, he should just get over it, he should just be a man. That was why Keira wouldn't marry him, because he wasn't a man, he was weak.

He was still haunted by his past and unable to move on, unable to find the strength to just get over it and make love to Keira. She wanted him to, she wanted him to be her first and last, he wished she'd be his first. He cringed as the memory crept into his mind; it all seemed fresh again, like speaking about it made it clearer. It made him realise what he had been denying, he had been denying what Erol had done to him.

So the secret was out but it left wounds and they were open, bleeding, just waiting to get infected. The infection started though, before Jak could stop it, the nightmares returned, the memories returned. He felt himself fighting each day just to be calm; it was so strange, it was like all that happened was not three years ago but only days. He realised he'd been so filled with rage the last three years that he hadn't had a chance to deal with it, to accept it, so the wound grew infected then, only now did he see he was sick.

As he walked into the garage and Keira came into his line of sight he felt himself relax, his haunting memories fading to black. He pulled the lovely mechanic into his waiting arms, allowing her to kiss him softly. She smiled up at him but it faded, her mouth set in a thin line. Her eyes filled with concern and she stepped back, holding his hands in her own.

"Jak, are you ok?"

Jak nodded and cleared his throat "I'm fine" he said forcing a feeble smile.

"You're lying" she retorted "you always look sheepish when you lie."

Jak sighed, shoulders sagging "I feel like… what happened… just happened yesterday, does that make sense."

"It does" she said stepping back to him "But baby you are safe, Erol is gone and everyone loves you and will protect you, you have nothing to be frightened of and I know it must be hard" she paused, trying to find the right words "but when you told me… it was to be expected that you'd feel this way, you've hidden it for so long, you forced it so far back into your mind that you almost forgot about it." She held his face in her hands and kissed the tip of his nose softly. "But you are strong and I believe in you and I know, without a doubt in my mind, that you can and _will_ be ok."

Jak smiled at her, a beaming smile and he felt some of the darkness lift "You really are my perfect little angel."

Keira mirrored the smile "and I always will be."

**Please review and let me know if I should do another sequel :)**


End file.
